Daily Checklist

Sometimes, I make a checklist of my day's events and forward it to friends purely for their amusement.  They often go kind of like this:

1. Awakened by 6 lb chihuahua (aka Ball of Hate) as she launches herself onto my bed and burrows under the covers.

2. Drag myself out of bed, dog runs to the sofa and burrows under a blanket

3. Take shower, water turns cold JUST after shampoo is in, finish getting ready

4. Attempt to leave house, go back in house and retrieve blankets for afternoon softball game

5. Attempt to leave house a second time, go back in for sweatshirt to wear at afternoon softball game

6. Attempt to leave house a third time, forget keys, go back in

7. Leave home for drive to work, 5 minutes too late, get caught in high school traffic

8. Arrive at work 5 minutes late, still beat boss by at least an hour

9. Sort thru evening’s e-mails, print out a ream of paper that needs to be filed, wonder if assistant will remember that filing is part of her office duties, make wager with myself that she will NOT remember.

10. Dream of new assistant that actually would assist

11. Boss arrives, the light in the office seems to instantly go darker

12. Boss begins verbal assault under his breath, contemplate making a tally of how many times I hear ‘this is bullshit’ or ‘what the f**’ or ‘sonofa**’

13. Take phone call from client who feels the need to share with me details of his recovery from prostate cancer surgery, repeatedly ask myself why??

14. Check online job listings

15. Receive text from youngest ‘hey im in office donr feel gooe no its anxitey so im gonna stqy just yeh im ok is that ok’, decipher text and sigh

16. Attend weekly therapy appointment with husband and youngest, return to work

17. Eat lunch at desk, check personal e-mails

18. Second text from youngest ‘heyy outta of school yep ok day no homework...so yeh...luv u how was ur day? Also todays day 15 a& we ran the mile I gto 9:40!’

19. Wrap up work early and head to softball game

20. Block away from game, get phone call saying no game, continue home

21. Get home, let dog out, clean up crate, start laundry

22. Field questions about dinner. Told that what I had planned doesn’t sound good.

23. Leave house and go to my Mother’s, do ‘wound care’, return home.

24. Forage for new dinner idea, make dinner

25. Leave home and do carpool for youngest’s evening activity.

26. Realize I forgot nephew’s first birthday, make mental note to rectify situation

27. Stop at 2 stores trying to find requested item, return home unsuccessful.

28. Check e-mails, sort thru mail and stack of bills, mental note to transfer $$ to oldest.

29. More laundry

30. Listen to older daughter’s plea for kitty, includes kitty sound effects which make dog bark and run in circles

31. Catch up volunteer bookkeeping ‘gig’ tasks

32. Receive text from son at college telling me to get a kitty, yell NO at older daughter

33. Daughter’s friend walks in, dog barks and runs in circles, yell at dog.

34. Leave house for reverse carpool

35. Back home, get youngest settled down for bed

36. 10:00 pm, pour glass of wine and watch reality show where women are fighting

37. Go to bed, dream about women arguing